Cruel Truths Learned During Pregnancies

When I was pregnant with Teagan I had my first experience with learning cruel truths from my midwives and it seems that I have had the *experience* of continued learning and growth with each subsequent pregnancy.

With Teagan, I was first told that (at 40 weeks along) stripping my membranes would likely send me into labor right away. So I eagerly agreed to it. It was done at my 40 week visit, again at my 41 week visit, and one more time at my 42 week visit. Nothing came from any of them other than a lot of pain. Finally the midwife told me that sometimes stripping the membranes does no good and that some babies just need the extra push from an induction to finally be evicted. Thank you very much for telling me that on my third go round - I enjoyed having it repeatedly done in the false hopes that it would work.

LESSON LEARNED: STRIPPING THE MEMBRANES IS A PAINFUL AND (IN MY CASE) USELESS PROCEDURE THAT SHOULD NOT BE REPEATEDLY DONE UNLESS YOU HAVE MASOCHISTIC TENDENCIES

With Garrett I was on bed rest for a few weeks because I was having too many contractions and they just said, "keep him in until June and then he can come." June came and went and then it was, "Keep holding in till July and he will be so much healthier." July came and went, too. August came and they said, "Okay, anytime now." So we waited and waited and contracted and contracted...he finally came. And he was early - one day early.
The first cruel truth I learned with him was gleaned during that last month of 'holding him in.' At my 36 week visit I was told that I was dilated to 1 centimeter. Then at my 37 week visit I measured 2 centimeters dilated - yippee, a little progress! Then at my 38 week visit I was told that I was only at a one again...how do you do that? No one had ever mentioned the possibly of my cervix CLOSING!! I was devastated. You don't tell an overly pregnant woman that she is going DOWN in dilation!!
The second truth came while I was in the hospital laboring. I had already gotten my epidural and everything was moving along swimmingly when I noticed that I was starting to to feel the contraction pains on one side of my body. I mentioned it to the nurses and they dismissed it for 20 minutes or so. I let them know that I was DEFINITELY feeling the contractions on one side and I was told that I must be laying on a nerve and pinching it off so the medicine wasn't working on that side - they had me roll over and lie on the opposite side to let the medicine slip to both sides...it never did. One side of me was completely aware of the pain childbirth brings!

LESSONS LEARNED: 1: DIFFERENT MIDWIVES/DOCTORS CAN HAVE DIFFERENT IDEAS OF WHAT A '1' IS OR ISN'T DEPENDING ON THE SIZE OF THEIR FINGERS; WHICH COULD RESULT IN YOU ACTUALLY APPEARING TO BE LESS DILATED THE FURTHER ALONG YOU GET. 2: EPIDURALS CAN WEAR OFF IN SHORT AMOUNTS OF TIME LEAVING YOU TO HAVE A NATURAL CHILDBIRTH BUT STILL HAVING TO PAY THE BILL FOR THE ANESTHESIOLOGIST

Owen's turn around brought a truth about ultrasounds. Towards the end of my pregnancy, I had measured the same for three weeks straight and the midwives got concerned that the baby might not be growing properly. An ultrasound was ordered and I was told that he had IUGR - intrauterine growth retardation. The measurements collected from the ultrasound showed that he had a barrel chest, unusually short legs and arms, and a larger than normal head. They and the doctors decided that he would grow better if he was induced early. I was told that he would be a little 'misshapen' and little - not bigger than 6 pounds. I was sent home and told to come back the next day to get him out so he could 'thrive' better outside the womb.
The next day I was induced and this perfect little boy was delivered - 7lbs even and perfectly proportioned. I had worried about my funny looking lawn gnome of a baby for nothing.

LESSON LEARNED - EVEN THE ULTRASOUNDS CAN BE WRONG

Emmett was my first baby that I sort of knew that I was in labor with. Tig and Owen were both induced and Garrett had brought so many contractions for so long, I didn't realize that I was actually in labor until I got the hospital after the doctor told me to 'go and get checked out' and they told me I was already at a 5 and fully effaced (the doctor hadn't clued us in on that tidbit of info)
With Emmy I had felt mild contractions every 12 minutes for most of the day and when the nighttime came, I wanted to go to sleep. So I filled a tub with warm water to calm the contractions down (since they weren't seeming to be doing anything) in the hopes that I could snag some sleep before he came. I hopped in and settled down for a relaxing soak. About 5 minutes in to my lavender bath time the contractions jumped up to coming every 30 seconds. 2 minutes later and I was out of the tub and we were calling someone to come watch the older kids while Scott and I headed to the hospital. After what seemed like a really long car ride (it was really only 20 minutes, but I told Scott that speeding was very much acceptable in the case of a laboring woman and that it would be okay to have a police follow/escort us to the hospital), I got to the hospital and into a room, was measured at 8 centimeters, given a speedy epidural, and he was here in no time. I had been at the hospital less than 30 minutes when he made his entrance.

LESSONS LEARNED: 1: WARM BATHS CAN DRASTICALLY SPEED UP LABOR, SO THEY MIGHT WANT TO BE AVOIDED AT 9:30 PM IF YOU WANT TO GET SOME SLEEP BEFORE THE BABY COMES. 2: THE BUMPS ON THE FREEWAY FEEL HIGHLY EXAGGERATED WHEN YOUR CONTRACTIONS ARE RIGHT ON TOP OF EACH OTHER AND NOT GOING DOWN.

That brings us up to Sparky. I learned my cruel lesson today for his pregnancy. He is playing the same game Garrett did with the whole "hold off until June; just keep cooking him till July;" and now he doesn't want to come.
At my appointment last week I was told I was 60% effaced and at a '1 plus' which she said is a one with wiggle room, or just under a two. It wasn't great news, but it was okay.
Another week of on/off contractions came and went and at my OB appointment today I was eager to hear that I had (hopefully) dilated more. (I would actually have loved to have been told to just head straight over the hospital because he was imminently coming, but even I knew that that was a long shot) She had a really hard time checking me and even called for an ultrasound to make sure Sparky was not breach since he is so high up. She checked me one more time and told me that my cervix was still thick but it was soft and ready and that "I could go at any time." The only hitch was that since he is hanging out so high up, he isn't putting pressure on my cervix to open. So I am dilated to a 4 at the opening of my cervix, but at the base, it is still just a 2. I asked her if that meant I was an average of a three, but she just laughed and said I was a 4 and a 2...I didn't know you could be two numbers at once!

LESSON LEARNED: YOU CAN HAVE TWO DIFFERENT DILATIONS AT A TIME, BUT THE LESSER ONE IS THE REAL HITCH

She didn't have any suggestions on how to get him to drop other than time. We had a friend come over who is a massage therapist and she gave me a nice massage to help open up my hips and pressed on some pressure points in the hopes that that will help him drop. We will see if it help relax things enough to actually let him drop. She has put others into labor after massages; contractions started within eight hours for them. She was here at 6pm tonight, so we will see what happens at 2 in the morning! Scott is supposed to walk at his graduation commencement tomorrow morning, so I guess the timing might be a tad inconvenient, but I do love a good science experiment and that is how I am viewing this!